Alan the Philosopher

I'll be in the Pasadena Hilton for the next four days for a sick conference. I think the Hiltons should name their next kid Pasadena, regardless of gender. Who names their daughter after a hotel? No wonder Paris is so messed up.

It's the pacific meeting of the American Philosophical Association. Awesome, that's my idea of a spring break. Shall I get naughty? Probably not, one of my professors asked a woman who worked in housekeeping what the difference was between a conference for english professors and a conference for philosophers. She said that english conferences leave hotel rooms littered with used condoms. In the rooms of philosophers she finds empty bottles of booze. That's one hell of a reputation philosophers have going - we know how to partay! Woo!

I think all this study is making me absent minded. In the last year, I've destroyed my computer, lost a cell phone, had my wallet stolen, last my replacement wallet, totaled my car, broke 4 pairs of sun glasses, burnt out my Bosch drill charger, and lost my tent poles in China. I'm not sure why anyone would let me touch a physical object, I mean, I'm just going to break it. Let that be a lesson to everyone, learn from Jesse and Shira. After all, two of those sunglasses weren't mine.